Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I am not old enough to be running into past fucks at the bank. This is at least a twenty five year old milestone.
Well after last night it's official...I cannot die...it time to use this power for good instead of handle contests
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
No it's okay, we're just driving to random places with the portable stripper pole and causing a ruckus.
Oh that's normal
I feel like somebody ate me, then shit me into my bed.
Ohhh,that's true. Babies are only fun when you're high. Otherwise, they're the worst kind of people.
There's a chance I told a cop that I was ready for him to strip I may have even taken some ones out of my purse and stuck them in his holster
I just ate 6 cheeseburgers with some homeless guy. Pretty epic.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
He finally left. I didn't introduce him to the roommate. The sex is bad. I don't want him to feel welcome
Do you think my laundromat will notice that the bloodstain on my sheets is in the shape of a face?
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
Randomize
