I think I left a blow job at your house. Can I come down and get it?
I gave it to your brother to give to you.
Is "blowjob enthusiast" a bad costume?
On the bright side I still get a $20 referral bonus at the plasma center even though he passed out during donation because he was so high.
Definitely contact high. Thirty miles an hour listening too i can see clearly now wanting too eat the steering wheel
No, no. The rest of his everything inspires me to put his dick in my mouth
There's a picture of you on facebook laying in the street with 3 cops standing over you after you faceplanted off that guy's shoulders.
Is that what happened to my face?!
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
The fact that he offered to stop once he stuck it in my ass was sadly the most considerate thing anybody's ever done for me.
I mean, he drove your car and it burst into flames, if anyone cant be trusted, it's him.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
He fucked me in his tour van, I feel like an official groupie.... Except I don't even listen to his band.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
There is a woman in the stall next to me giving a pep talk to her daughter that wants to call off her wedding. I'm afraid to pee!
i like coming up with different names when i reference that night. 'the night i got kicked out of the bar', 'the night i escaped from the hospital', 'the night we had that threeway'...
Shelly has the weirdest luck. Dude offered her a job riding a bucking bronco and it was not porn or stripping but an actual g-d cow.
Randomize
