Doing final review now. Then epic shit. Then going to take it. Should start it be 1030. Done by 2. Drunk by 3. Hammered by 4. Blacked out by 5. Streaking by 6. Jail sometime after that
So... 5th graders can't whisper for shit, but apparently I have an awesome rack.
Haha. Niice.
Yeah, I didn't know whether to be shocked or flattered.
both.
So for Valentine's Day...I finally swallowed. I feel like I earned that steak.
on of the only things i remember was the security guard told me i was too drunk for laser tag.
i just had to google what happens if your dog eats your nuva ring
I doubt the Taliban would support fake nipples.
You didn't want to have sex last night because you said your grandpa just died and you didn't want him watching..
You would be married by May if you put half as much energy into getting straight guys as you do into getting gay guys
Well you really should've thought of that before you painted your walls the same color as your toilet
you know you're a senior when your friends are at the bar before you even get out of class
why the fuck would you go to class? it's karaoke wednesday.
So the name of the kid from the sponsor a child comercial popped into my head while I was masturbating this morning. Needless to say I will now be now be donating out of guilt.
I think I was the only one who knew you were acting like you weren't drunk in public issues discussion this morning. Make sure you thank me in your Academy Award Speech someday.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
I am playing in the snow in my bunny outfit. GET OVER HERE
Remember when we thought adulthood would be different than college?
It is different. We had hopes and dreams back then. Now we're just alcoholics.
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