Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
4 words: hood of his car
I had his cock in my mouth and he still wouldn't shut up about Star Wars.
I'm putting "buy a bottle of scotch" on my "productive things to do to procrastinate studying for finals" list
Btw after this weekend the chipndales costume has a 125% success rate.
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
I'm expecting you to come by soon and a magical night of sex and floating on clouds to follow.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
he stopped talking to me, quit his job, moved out of the province and then told me it was "no big" when I called him apologizing...
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
You know it's been a rough week when you funnel beers by yourself.
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
So I was laying on the couch reading a book and he texted me. All I saw was the image of him spitting on my vagina last night in the moonlight. I gagged.
For full disclosure: I told my roommates last night that you have a very clean asshole.
I had such a bad bruise on my knees from blowing him so much, he asked if he could sign it...
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