so many types of cookies right now. i'm eating four kinds of cookies that i've made into larger cookie sandwiches. too high. whoa.
The tent wall coming unstaked in the wind and hitting me in the face really sobered me up
You kept screaming "Its taco night!" before every shot
Fuck men. I'm going to go eat a package of cookie dough and get fat. I hope I die of salmonella.
once you started introducing yourself as "running-bear" i knew you were beyond fucked up
I think theres a high possibility i could be flammable.
He stood up, threw the bag of bud between me and Tory, yelled "Fight" and then ran upstairs for the pizza
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
They wont sell alcohol here on election day! HOW THE FUCK DO THEY EXPECT ME TO ENJOY THE ELECTION SOBER?
Thank you contacting dial-a-boner. Currently, our boner is on a run to service another client. You can either wait 2 hours for service, or share concurrent service with the current client.
I'm tryin a pb and onion sandwich now
Please smoke with me until I agree that sounds like a good idea
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
NO FUCKBOY SHALL PASS OPERATION #BITCHMODE HAS SUCCEEDED
What am I thankful for..I figured out I can drink on antibiotics without getting sick thanks to the power of pot gummies
I'm sorry for chipping my tooth on your vagina last night :(
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