Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
I opened my browser to a doctor page titled "serious pain under left side of ribcage". Last night must have been healthy.
So the next morning, she had to tell her kids we were moving furniture around all night.
im laying here in the parking lot drinking a warm coke, prob still drunk, feeling like i need to apologize to everyone i know
we have 69 mutual friends...i have to add her
dude, my ass and shoulder hurt from that kayak last night... note to self: wood planks holding kayak from ceiling do not also hold up a human being
What drink are we having for lunch?
Had sex with one of the guys from Ireland. Celebrating st pattys early.
I really don't think there's anything more liberating than farting.in a loud bar where no one.can.hear you
He seduced me by making me nachos. It worked.
CURSE YOU AND YOUR SEXY LOGIC
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
We broke my graduation cords last night when we used them to tie each other up during sex last night
I responded with revoking his blow job privileges. Needless to say, he's learned his lesson.
I told him we can’t see each other today because absence makes the heart grow fonder but mostly I just need to rest my vag
Randomize
