I have to decide between the hot young blond with no apparent gag reflex, and the brunette with a great ass and a trust fund.
I have a new reason to go to work: I can tell which 3 of my coworkers are sisters just by looking at their butts.
one day I'm really going to regret not using the boners I got in planes and cars
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
no really all good couples have similar hair colors!
he said no sex till date three. i said the party was one, mcdonalds two and that i would take him with me to buy cigs for date three.
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
I am going to dream of scrotums tonight, I just know it.
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
Do you participate in Sunday morning booty calls?
Dammit! I didn't see this message, of course I do.
And he came all over himself. At least he didn't ruin my new lulus.
Actually though that could've been bad.
Ah, drunk me ordered sushi at 3 a.m. for sober me's lunch the next day. EXCELLENT
All I can think about are the cheese it's on my desk at work this morning. Like are those apologetic cheese it's or does he seriously think he still has a shot..
That was right around the time that the drunken mess pulled out his dick in front of myself and like 10 other people and started peeing all over the train platform while saying, "Sometimes a bear gets you brother. Sometimes a bear gets you."
Pretty standard Thursday night commute for you, no?
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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