I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
They told me I spent half the night at the club with one ball hanging out my shorts. Apparently it got me 1 free drink, 2 numbers, and thrown out.
and then you went into taco bell without pants...and surprisingly you weren't the only one there without pants
Although I wish I was out drinking, this cough syrup has me slightly more optimistic than usual.. I heavily debating trying to find mystical creatures and selling them to rich people as pets
Her desktop wallpaper is a collage of penises she fucked.
i miss freshman lecture halls much harder to take shots in a class of 20
When we were texting for those few weeks, I some how established a crush on you. And its weird and wild and stupid and silly. But these things just have to be said sometimes to determine what's real and what is infatuation. And to suffer the consequences of five am drunk philosophy. No regrets.
I just hope I don't wheeze during sex
1. I'm excited for tonight 2. Do we dress up as pirates? 3. Happy Valentine's Day bae
What has my life come to that I have to spank someone in morse code?
On your day off do you wanna get wine drunk and take a few episodes of Jerry Springer way too seriously with me?
I shall relish in being the most basic of bitches
Was make out with a 38 year old lesbian on our bucket list? if it was you can go ahead and cross that one off.
Hey I had a great night last night but I don't want to lie to you I'm only 19 and that wasn't my place its was my cousin he's gone for the summer and I was just house sitting and watching his cat I'm sorry
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