normal stoners make pot brownies. gay stoners make pot chocolate covered cherries on a cinnamon graham cracker crust which by the way are very effective.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
Disadvantage of being gay..... my gag reflexes makes trying to make myself throw up extremely difficult.
its totally unfair that im just as ill-prepared as a 16 year old but there's no tv show for 25 and pregnant.
He made me hold his dick and say "I solemnly swear that I'm up to no good"
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
not a day goes by that I don't wish you were here or I there. Today it was because I had the desire to get high and go look at the jellyfish at the aquarium and you're the perfect buddy for that.
I just put bronzer on my abs to snapchat nudes. If that's not going hard I don't know what is
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
For a second I thought I had fallen asleep on the floor and freaked out. Then I thought somehow I was on drugs. This is my life.
Yeah, sorry about that. Dropped the phone on my face while I was watching porn.
I'll be wearing lingerie and holding a bottle of bourbon so pick up whatever food you think goes with that
dude, you ran into a window then asked ME what the fuck I was doing.
Just spilled beer all over my bed. Should cut myself off, but instead I just took my shirt off and used it as a towel.
Randomize
