I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Oh just living the dream. And by living the dream I mean drinking franzia out of a martini glass and watching family matters. Also, drinking every time Carl Winslow has a mustache and Eddie wears MC Hammer pants
she bonged a coffee cause she was hungover. then she bonged a beer cause she got ambitious. then she barfed. then she had to start over again.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
Funny how I'm trusting a magic 8 ball I found in the kids toy section to tell me about my sex life
New life goal: fuck in the shopping cart
He snorted adderall on my table. I have a feeling he's not trying to buy me flowers
She told him that she never wanted to see him again then took his takeout box of bacon cheddar fries and got in the uber saying "for feminism"
ICE CREAM AND CAKE BITCHESSSSSS
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
its not much but to go through all that to ask for half a balls worth of money was so stressful
Being high is definitely not the perfect addition to this family dinner. No. My grandma trips me the fuck out.
Randomize