I bet Jafar would keep his hat on during
I have so many mobile devices now, I only use my laptop for porn.
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
video games are the ultimate cock blocker
I was totally going to sleep with him, until he got naked and started swinging around his boner singing "I'm so hard. oh yeah yeah yeah, I'm so hard" like Rihanna.
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
the bar tender told me i could keep an air matress in the backroom.
I woke up naked in his kitchen...His name is Mike and we're having a "what happened last night" beer.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
So you're saying you don't want to be with her anymore because she likes sex to much and is just to hot?
Well when you say it that way it makes me sound like an idiot.
You are an idiot.
After getting rejected by him, I got a strangely pleasant dick pic from an unknown number with the caption: "I hope this gets you through the night ;)" It's like the Cock-Gods were shining down upon me.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
you found yr lighter in yr cleavage and said so that's where you've been all my life
the cop asked if i was drunk and i responded with "breathalize me, cap'n". incidentally, he was a captain and i blew a .13.
Randomize