all her text said was "asdfhdaufhudshfuds" and i knew that meant come over
Just spent the last of my lifesavings on (what i hope is enough of) alcohol. Hello summer.
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
If our dicks could shake hands in congratulations they would
...And then you kept screaming "cock mouth" in her face every time she tried to talk.
I have never smelled more like a drunk mariachi band than I do right now.
by the way- Brandy out of a doggy bowl was AMAZING
I took a few sips of my hugeee bottle of liquid Vicodin and smoked my one hitter and now I'm going thru my attic like Indiana Jones
Speaking of gay, some dude in a life vest just goes, we should pull our dicks out! To larry. Were leaving now. I saw penis
I started blowing him in North Dakota, and I finished the job in Minnesota. Oh, the places road head can take you.
Wait. You NEVER used a Dizzy Doodler pen as a vibrator?!?
Seriously bro? Indoor roman candle wars? I guess I'll never see that fucking security deposit again
When you licked the fourth stranger's cheek the bar tender pretty much ordered us to get you out.
Then you guys just all showered together...?
Hey I’m obsessed with Charlie Heaton from stranger things...not because he got caught at the border with coke...okay that’s a lot of it
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