I just didn't expect you to be so naked....
The walls in my apartment are so thin that sometimes when I fart, I stop to listen if people are laughing next door.
FIrst one done
How did it go?
I dunno I taled about women being treated wrong and quoted Ice T. So probably a "c"
Is it weird I want to fuck the cartoon chick from e-surance??
Security brought me back to our hotel room in a wheelchair last night. Vegas.
And if you ever tell anyone that I will fucking kill you.
Seriously. He was just sitting there naked in the dark with a boner pissed that I came home late.
I got called a drunken housewife today in class. I'm proud, not many people can say they've achieved their life goals like I have by the time they turn 20
There is booty call etiquette, and he just isn't following it. I'm not making you breakfast, gtfo.
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
im glad im back to a point in my life where i have enough sex to sometimes be offered and be like naw im good.
You ask too many questions when I'm blowing you. You're like a dentist asking how my day has been during a cleaning.
Mmm. Champagne. Weed. 17 pounds of animal crackers.
I'm on the fast track to lesbian land
Apparently I thought every drink in my house needed to have a buddy so I put some vodka in each one. Long story short being wasted at work because the gatorade you brought is 60% liqour is not a great idea.
If you think that liquor is the way to shower sex then you're right.
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