You were wearing a sombrero. And a crown. And told me to use the nerf gun to protect your room from the cat. You don't have a cat.
ppl dont tell me stories about anal. apparently im not a tell-me-stories-about-anal kind of person
Just saw ur first draft of ur suicide note.
You spelled "worthless" wrong.
you were carrying a trash bag around insisting it was your purse. I'll let you guess how your night went
oh my god i just remembered the cat blow jobs.
He told me I had nice tits + they have a great shape. + then proceeded to flatten my boob + show me what the gross tits he's seen look like.
he actually managed to pick a girl up by telling her that her skirt was ugly and she didnt do a good job with her makeup. thats some seriously low selfesteem
It's ok. Rob's just shotgunning upside down.
You were so drunk you decided to go out of the car window instead of using the door, once you realized what you had just done you said fuck it and went back in through the window
Vodka drinking games. Where you wake up next to a douche lord and see your thong in the blinds.
Well I walked the wrong way for a little bit and I don't remember if I fell asleep or not but I definitely laid down under the over pass for a while
We told you to act sober so to prepare yourself you started doing squats and stretching then you slapped yourself and walked in
I'm not dropping acid and watching game of thrones with you. That just sounds like a disaster waiting to happen.
He put his SoundCloud on his Tinder bio. I felt personally attacked.
FINE I guess I'll just drink regular coke like a PLEBIAN.
Randomize
