we're blogging at a bar
i hope you realize when i said "grib" earlier i was referring to the gridded binary, a mathematically concise data format commonly used in meteorology to store historical weather forecast data. also meant in referential conjunction to my probability math class that i am failing at roughly 215pm tomorrow afternoon.
He could be your dad!
We discussed that right before he asked for my number
I think east. Tornado watch. What the fuck are you doing in Texarkana?
Bonnaroo. Tornado watch? Expand on that thought.
Watch for tornadoes.
i have a reoccuring irrational fear i'm going to walk in on my dad masterbating. Night.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
I thought making out with his sister would be a great way of meeting him. But it backfired.
I'm not really made for random hookups.. i'm like a swan.. i don't wanna have random swan sex. i just wanna have one swan hubby and fly around the world together and eat bread that people throw at us..
Come get your boy. He's cuddling with a bag of rice on the floor.
So what kind of fun pills do we have for the amusement park tomorrow?
Omphalophobia is a real thing. don't ever fucking touch my belly button again dude
It reeks of weed and poor life decisions in here
he literally walked in took a shit and left ringing the 'great service' bell on the way out.
Also, I'm not that drunk, but I'm thinking of pulling the blinds all the way up and casting some porn up onto the living room TV to establish dominance over our neighbors.
Is it too much to ask to have a life partner who has both male and female sex organs that looks cute and sounds like a female Antonio Banderas and likes to get weird?
Randomize
