i think he might wanna be bffs again, but idk cause we're friends again but we haven't been bff since like a year. i don't know what to think...
wow. what a nail bitter. i need popcorn for this. brb
I wish I could tape me & him having sex. Not for pornographic reasons, just for comic relief.
im already regretting the extreme lack of break up sex that took place
Tonight that bitch will not be with him. You will drunkingly talk him out of this wedding. It is your duty as the one with the least amount of soul. Good luck.
This weekend was suppose to be a 'smoke weed and stare at things' weekend. Not a 'spend all my rent money partying with Europeans till 8 am' weekend
Yeah but those French chicks did get naked
well I was pissed. first he yelled at me for having my own condoms, then he got mad when they didn't fit him. Dude, I only fuck magnum men.
Should I have a moral quandary about Skyping topless with him while his son slept in the other room?
The other night I NICELY told her she looked like Jack Sparrow
I love you. We're gonna celebrate your 21st by putting people in duct tape bikinis and pushing them down tequila slip and slides
It's snowing in May and there was a law school party at the strip club. The end is near.
just passed the gas station where we took pregnancy tests. memories.
We broke up. And I told him he better give me my fucking star wars movies tomorrow. Priorities.
Masturbated while waiting for my face mask to dry, so it was a productive night.
I lost my wallet so I paid for my cab ride home with a sausage sandwich I found in my purse. Must have thought it was my wallet.
I'm completely creeped out. He's dressed as me. And thinks it's funny.
Randomize
