jackpot. dress really slutty so he knows you mean business
I feel like i'm in "To Catch a Predator - The Musical"
I try to help out whenever I can. Speaking of rough nights I woke up half naked on Brady's couch with bloody paper towels duct taped to my foot.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
You'd think the dry cleaners next door would be less judgmental for as much business as my theme parties bring them.
his brother walked in while we were fucking on the couch, told me i had "lovely jugs" and offered to make both of us a drink
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
Why do I have "apologize to Dave Coulier" written on my hand?
Let's put it this way, there's not many girls I wouldn't let sit on my face
Just had a reminder come up that just said "Ham"
I'm sure he likes you too... but your boyfriend is kind of a cockblock
So you're willing to shred any respect that you had for your body on some random chick who's only looking for sex? That's the worst thing I've ever heard.
I mean, it won't be 100% meaningless, I know her middle name.
3 hour lecture of my biology teacher talking about isotopes and space shuttles. I'm way too high for this.
He's a college graduate, has an excellent job, and respects his family. To say nothing of his 8.5 inch cock. His narcolepsy not withstanding...I'm marrying this motherfucker.
Randomize
