Locked eyes w/ her at mainstreet, and said 'yeah yeah get it!' From there we started violently making out on the dancefloor (I had a FULL boner, ps) and then I got her number
Is it just me or are more fat girls getting belly button piercing these days?
I think I might be in your shoes. Except they are actually my shoes. Either way these shoes are wasted.
She made me put my jeans under her mattress so that I wouldn't leave in the morning while she was still sleeping. Apparently I just look like "that guy".
He's either a really good actor or an actual prince, I'm fine with both so I'll sleep with him.
fyi, she knows we call her the sperm bank. watch your back.
You'd be so proud. I have the flu/sore throat, so I've tied a scarf around my head and I'm microwaving jagerbombs. Let it never be said I'm not commited.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
Fun fact: I don't want to be an actual functioning adult because why
Just took plan b with my eggs and chai...homecoming got the best of me already
He made a playlist to use during sex...that ended with The Ultimate Warrior's entrance music.
I woke up knowing I have nowhere to be today except parties and it was glorious and I am so happy
I just went to cvs and bought condoms, handcuffs and a coloring book
You tried to run away last night. The neighbors brought you back.you were in their hot tub again. This needs to stop
Randomize
