wanna go halves on a baby?
Would it be too much if i wore depends to new moon so i dont miss any of it?
I think I'm cybering, it's been a while and its more in depth than it was in 8Th grade.
even iPhones love lady gaga. everytime I type haha it trys to correct it to gaga. this is bullshit...
dudes here are drinking wine, and not in the forgivable 'just doing this to get laid' way
No, not at all. Pulling a condom out of your vag at 2pm is NOTHING like finding $10 in your winter coat. Stop trying to make me feel better.
She passed out on the kitchen table with two mickeys forties duct taped to her hands. Clearly she is going to fit perfectly in your house this semester
when was she peeing in the stairwell? why dont i remember this?
....because generally we only remember 40% of the night each, and have to fill eachother in. And that still leaves 20% that we will never know and its probably for the best
i want to be friends with one of those mini shredded wheat men.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Man. Apparently I blacked out between the 4th margarita and my air mattress. Asleep in my jeans at 10pm. Mom outdrank me again.
Probably won't be invited back there again considering last time his purebred corgi ate my pot brownie and had to be rushed to the hospital.
I stole us four large rolls of toilet paper from the hotel carts. I feel like the breadwinner in this relationship
Lol I'm not having group sex with you, that apron is fuckin awesome tho
There’s an entire generation of people out there who didn’t grow up watching Mr. Rogers and it shows. These Boomers need to get their shit together.
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