You're my favorite asian/girl I've met here.
You're ridiculous
Your hot
so on my way home this naked dude runs right in front me his weiner at half mast screaming i'm only doing this cause its a 50 dollar dare
If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I think I found my soulmate. This guy in front of me is yelling about getting laid while holding two beers and texting. I think this is love.
The idea of snorting emergen-c actually just crossed my mind.
who was wearing the fake mustache? I just found one in my cleavage
Pretty sure the girl next to me in Chipotle just came out to her mom.
He kept falling asleep with the pizza in his hand. I woke him up and told him and he was shocked because he thought he ate it all. Then he would end up falling asleep and we'd repeat the whole process again.
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
He was just lying in his underwear like a present. I had to unwrap it.
so she gave me back a bag of clothing, had some boxers in it...they werent mine.... well that sums up 5 years of my life
I never thought I would have to put a band-aid on my penis.
we're spending all day in bed drinking spiked eggnog and fucking
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I hooked up with a sophomore, passed out at midnight, and apparently drunkenly peed on Nicole's wedding invitation
Randomize
