hell yes lets make some ravioli
I love how all the girls on the plan b commercial wake up alone.. Like me
he's a nude model. what could you have done to make him feel awkward??
That's the great thing about NY, if you pee your dress you have an entire cab ride to air dry your panties before the next club.
Yea. But u kept saying "as long as she doesn't have aids" so I was concerned
morning after pill = breakfast in bed
I'm pretty sure the guy she brought home is a polish porn star..
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
Are you sighing at your phone and judging me right now?
It doesn't matter how many times you look in your purse, Your keys are not going to be there. Maybe you left them at the bar.
Maybe they fell out of my pocket last night when I rolled down the hill.
Getting a vibrator would be like waving the white flag of surrender in this war against my vagina and its hormone army.
And after we debated politics. My dream come true: naked, just got done having great sex with a hot mixed guy, talking about why social welfare programs are a bad idea
I've never wanted anyone to have herpes as I much as I want him to right now.
Side Note: Everyone in my office is getting engaged and having baby showers. And I'm all like, fuck your joy, I just want more string cheese in my life.
He left a fire sauce packet from taco bell that said "promise you'll text me in the morning" on my nightstand.
Randomize