Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
he asked me to help him wrap his girlfriends birthday presents. Dont worry we fucked right after.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
Your dad's facebook is ejaculating midlife crisis all over my minifeed
Is it cum slut, cumslut or cum-slut? Sexting, plz advise ASAP
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
Unlimited sex for unlimited netflix. I can deal with that. I think this is the first prostitution deal for netflix ever.
if you had such a terrible roommate you would understand. jacking off in his conditioner is just the start.
One huge ass giant mistake followed by celebatory shots and coors lights thats my day in a nut shell
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
The Easter dress struggle is real
Yep. Just had to pull mine off to puke.
He sent me a snap of him eating a tamale shirtless. I think I might be in love.
LOCK HIM DOWN.
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
you went over there?
His drunk texts were grammatically perfect. At least our kids will be smart.
Randomize
