me texting you is like we have secret walkie talkies.
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
Just woke up on a couch in the FIJI house with 2 missed calls from someone I saved in my phone as "Some DU Kid Named TJ Maybe"
you make me proud to be your friend
Its 11am everyones wasted wearing sombreros and eating fresh produce..cesar chavez would be very proud
So my retainer doesn't fit, so i'm getting drunk so i can put it back in. Alone.
You would...
She carries her pencils in a crown royal bag... Need I say more?
No way. Our relationship is based solely on texting and sex. A phone call would be too much at this point.
If I interpreted our horoscopes correctly...you should be coming home with an 8 ball. Just saying.
I hate that you live in a gated community. I feel your guard judges me every time I go to your house at 3 am an leave at 5am
You are like the only girl I know who tells their booty call to go find another girl just cause you want more sleep.
We can put you in charge of something
I can be in charge of being more wasted than anyone there so everyone feels comfortable being ridiculous
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
We laughed, we cried, we fucked, we shirked our familial and work related responsibilities. They could make a movie about the last 40 hours of our lives.
Is it bad if I look at someone i dont know and just want to punch them in the face?
He’s perfect! He listens to Genesis during sex and has a VW bus!
You really are from the panhandle, aren’t you?
Randomize