the crunchwrap supreme is the def leppard of the taco bell menu
which is why it's clearly superior
Mines from giving head on hardwood floors.
dipping my christmas cookies in kaluha. santa would be proud.
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
If I die I am blaming you for not answering to tell me the proper dosage of horse tranquilizers to take
Woke up this morning with a junior police officer sticker over my nipple this morning.
Does it count if I'm only ambidextrous while masturbating?
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
The woman in the hospital bed next to me just got diagnosed with flea bites on her vag.
Whaaaaaat? No way.
Now a discussion of pigs vs. dog as carrier.
After a few mimosas, my mom started sharing her plans to move out of the house and into a retirement village so she can be the youngest one there and find herself a "nice old sugar daddy." Needless to say, break has not started off well...
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
i got pulled over completely sober but looking like death. dick cop made me do a field sobriety test. he also said "no sober person could have 7 BK bags"
you woke up this morning in a laundry basket, only wearing rainboots.
And I think she just drunkenly ordered an ipad. she said it was so pretty she couldn't keep it "locked up" because an ipad has to be let free.
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