I wannas sexs uuuuu
I've decided that I only have enough money to either eat or drink over the next month. I'm sure you know what choice I've made.
guy in the car over is getting some terrible road head. he just gave me a thumbs down when he noticed i was watching.
the question is "speedos?" and the answer is "yes".
I think they took out their livers years ago and replaced them with like cheese graters or something. Only explanation.
she pretty much pinned my hand to her boob "on accident" for like 10 seconds before she moved. Waiting the rest of the night was just a formality.
There is a video recording of my birth. I have seen it. It is terrifying.
All I've done for this 11 hour car ride is kegel and listen to our sex playlist so your dick better be good and ready
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
Is the Glover Park Chipotle past the strip club?
Why is that your only point of reference?
Just answer the question
She gave me a job then fed me cheesecake in bed. She's a keeper!
Uhm... Found a ziploc bag... In the freezer. Sam, thought it was lemonade. Why did you make frozen piss at my house, again?
Who knew she had talents apart from chugging wine spritzers
Just remembered sticking my head out the window as i drove us to walmart and yelling that i was a golden retriever.
Also, sorry for verbally assaulting you when you asked if you could dump the bowl.
If he isn’t into CosPlay he will be after tonight. That naughty nurse outfit heals broken hearts
Randomize
