aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Just a heads up. Everytime I get arrested in Maine I claim I lost my ID and use your name.
Correct me if I'm wrong, but I did not stop moving last night. If tequila gives me that extra push to have an active lifestyle, so be it.
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
FOUR LOKO IS YES. SUNDAY MORNING DRUNK IS YES.
the most drunk i have ever been? possibly. the most drunk i have ever been on a monday? definently.
Hey do you want me to wrap up that Jack in the Box you left in my gutter
Besides. I seriously had a dream that George W Bush came over and slapped some tabs down on my kitchen counter and said "let's get juiced.". It was a sign to not get too fucked up
Sometimes you just gotta fuck a has been local celebrity for your 15 minutes.
So I got my junk pierced since we've fucked. You should get in on this.
And then he said he wanted to "get really weird with me on my horse." I took that as he wants to fuck me while riding my horse. Could be a good time.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
we need to make pact to not cut each other's hair on coke and whiskey nights.
While I agree, I dont think thats realistically possible
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
You went home with a guy at 11... than returned to the bar at 1
Randomize
