Considering the face that your still in jail Im gunna go with no.
i love my job...i have craft hour at my desk w twizzlers
can u grab me a application
don't worry, i have a range rover and a brother hopped up on steroids.. we can solve this little misunderstanding quite easily.
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
How am I still drunk? Whoever said breakfast is the most important meal obviously didn't skip dinner and go drinking.
I love reading their "i love you more" , "no i love you more" war on facebook today knowing that he hooked up with me last night. I bet i know who wins that one.
I was just wished a Happy Valentine's Day by the (Mexican) Chinese food delivery guy. I've never had clearer "get your life together" message than that.
You should've come to the party. It was like an identity parade of everyone you screwed last year.
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
He's getting me an energy drink and said good morning beautiful. He must sense i'm cutting him off from the sex.
Now I can't say for certain but I'm 90 percent are I bathed myself with dog shampoo last night
last night on the strip the guy screamed at you YOU GOTTA WORK ON YOUR CALVES.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
The cat is stealing cigarettes and my vagina cures blindness. How's your night?
Drunk you wants to be petty, not you you.
Randomize