Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
I'm pretty sure I have jizz on the back of the dress I wore to church. Awesome.
that coffee was exactly what I needed. Also whose awesome hat is on the couch with ear flaps? I wanna put my head in it
I bought the tickets, he brought the weed. thanks to you, we had to roll a joint out of my bible paper.
I always figured rock bottom would've involved more hookers
They are chanting tits for freedom and I'm highly considering
This bitch flirting at the bar needs to close her legs and open up a book. I can literally feel my IQ dropping every time she bends down to show her tits.
Jealous?
Very.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I made it with a guy dressed as Mitt Romney. I told him "you can't have my vote, but you can have my body"
I'm pretty sure my intestines are bleeding but I'm still going to Orlando to catch that orgasm.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
So red wine goes with eggs, right? Because that's all I have in the house to cook and the drinking options are either wine or scotch
She's too awesome to dump: she gives me great blow jobs and free Popeyes. You just don't burn a bridge like that.
My concern for you and peanut butter is the reason I am still awake.
Randomize
