hey no worries the mystery has been solved- i jst sneezed and my undies popped outta my nose.
also referred to as T.P.S. (Toddler Penis Syndrome)
I can trace it back to that drunken night where we peed on each other in the shower.
We decided to play beer pong where the loser had to beer bong a pitcher of beer...people just started losing on purpose. It was a bad idea.
Heed the warning of the ghost of Oktoberfest present: German beer is soooooooo much better than our watered down children's piss. also lost all my clothes and am wearing lederhosen the rest of the trip.
Give him a trash can and a welcome home balloon, he will be good.
walk of shame to my ortho appointment. kids are staring. this little girl just asked her mom if she can havr glitter in her hair too.
"it's Wednesday" isn't a good enough excuse to take my debit card and use it for your own drunken needs. You owe me 250 bro
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Only you could successfully troll for dick at a Hillel bake sale.
Talking to a customer about getting high and staring at glow in the dark wheels while there is a cop in the store. Just another day in Tampa
is telling someone you can be his trophy wife the same as proposing?
She shoved her hand down my pants and held my cock for thirty minutes in the bar. It was like she was letting all the other females know I was hers.
Why can't you just be normal and get dick pics from your exes like everyone else?
its a comptetion of fuckups and im HERE TO WIN
Randomize