idk hes just been lookin at me weird all night
he probably just wants to cut your skin off and wear you like a body suit
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
Can someone please explain to me why I woke up looking like Ziggy Stardust
the fucking easter bunny is here. he just made 3 cups in a row. no one knows who he is..
I've banged too many servicemen's wives to still be considered an American.
There's a difference between southern and inbred. She just doesn't know that yet.
I didn't take her seriously until she snorted that ramen noodle flavor packet...
Not even desperate vagina wants small cock.
Glad to hear you raised your standards
If only we could all 3 say fuck school to be stoner flight attendants
Ya. I wonder how much being a beard for a major league baseball player pays. This could be a lucrative arrangement...
The plan was to get laid... Now the plan is to survive.
I'm pants less watching buffy the vampire slayer drinking rum. I'm not that hard to impress
Yes I peed all over myself and lost both my credit cards, who wants to know?
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Thanks for the hospitality last night.
You mean sex?
Yes....hospitality.
Randomize
