i think i may have caused an international incident at the french embassy, just fyi
hahaha how?
its a long story involving a horse trailer and some shrubbery
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
It was one of those "since we're naked anyway" type situations
If I had a penis, I would stick it EVERYWHERE. I don't know what these guys are doing.
I felt like a dog for all the times during sex that he said "good girl"
The cops caught them pow wowing in the teepee at the entrance of the golf course at 5 am. But were still missing someone.
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
U should just post that picture of u two on facebook with the caption, does anyone know this girl? If so please tell her to take plan b, thanks
last night a police horse bit me when i was wasted. even the animal kingdom knows i'm no good
Just found out I called my mom at six in the morning to ask where the bong was. I win.
I always thought The Big Bang Theory wasa terrible show but that was before it came with blowjobs and pizza.
Sooooooo this guy just asked me if I'd be interested in a threesome... I'm considering bc I would get to hang out with his dog afterwards.
I am so horny that I an legitimately concerned for your safety when I see you tonight.
My bed smells like the plague
Be there in a sec. We have to stop at Target to buy her underwear first.
Randomize
