I just jerked it to the same porn two nights in a row... and she says I have problems with commitment...
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
was it good sex?
i mean it was good for how drunk we were. and for how big the closet was
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
That's not as bad as watching a dumb ass drunk peeing into your window fan -
He drinks vodka like healthy people drink water and I wanted to have his adopted gay babies. That's all. I'm going to go find him and potentially propose.
One. But meh. I upped my age limit to like 29 hoping I'll match with this one fedex guy that delivers packages to my work
2015 is the year I FINALLY ALMOST had enough dick to satisfy me.
I just need a fucking pair of pants. Is that too much to ask for?
I am pants-free in the living room. This is liberating.
Just paid for birth control in all ones do you think she is judging me?
remind me again why we thought drinking hungarian moonshine was a good idea
Hmm should I take my nipple rings out before my sisters wedding/family vacation in Puerto Rico where I will be with my mother 24hrs a day for four days wearing a bathing suit seemingly the entire time? Or should I just risk it and not hug anyone.
Risk it. Keep the titties tough.
I just came in my own mouth don't ask me how cuz it really hurt and felt good at the same time.
Randomize
