marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
I think I left something in your back seat.... It was my integrity
some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Did u pay ur friends to not make fun of me?
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
We got blackout for the alumni dinner, and then walked THROUGH the keynote speaker, managing to still say "excuse me".
I'll probably regret it tomorrow. But right now, accepting this $2000 credit card so that I can finance booty calls from across the united states sounds like a golden idea.
So there I was praying he didn't go limp again, choking on a long, long gray ball hair. This is my Saturday night. This. Is. My. Life.
The cops came, and I made friends with him. He wants me to babysit his kids.
We fired a shoe out of a medieval cannon. I know not where we got either one.
I found a briefcase foll of fireworks in my old bedroom...that's an appropriate thing to bring to a wedding, right?
Look man if you're looking for a voice of reason, you're talking to the wrong woman.
His life is a porno. He snapped me while banging a girl in the back of the ambulance.
It's not my fault you decided to fall in love with a Frodo Baggins lookalike
So what's it like to be pregnant?
It feels like I'm hungover and when I was drunk I was kicked off a mechanical bull and then trampled.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
