The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
Do you ever make guys send you dick pictures just cause it's hilarious?
Did you wake up with "jello shots" stamped on your hand too?
and then she judged me for using my bra as a potholder. hard times my friend, welcome to college.
i think we should start charging the bum that sleeps on our porch rent..
Just had lapdance from stripper that had her 5th kid 28 hours earlier. A for work ethic.
Tipped our cab with a photo booth pic of us, a paper dollar, a dollar in quarters, a crest white strip. And a tanning pass valid in boston
Some girl at the bar was showing us her chipped tooth as a pick up line.
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
She called it a palate cleanser. She and her friend dike it out once a year before returning to dick
Together or do they pick up? How far do they go? IS AN AUDIENCE PERMITTED? GODAMIT ANSWERS MAN!!!!!!
Well sure, my hetero side is thrilled, but my gay side is soooo judging
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
its like my accent is a device for a 100% chance of sex every time i leave the apartment. i love being english in this country.
I'm a little concerned about right now. You showed up at my house soaking wet, drunk with a bag of ham and 2 liter of Dr. Pepper, and you refused to tell me where you got the ham until I gave you some more liquor.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
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