this girl just gave me her phone number and 5 mins later right in front of me she is giving her number to another dude
call her and ask her what she thinks she's doing
I feel like ignoring a facebook event is a lot like a pocket-veto. The only difference is instead of opposing legislation, I don't want to go to your sketchy party.
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
not sure what to think.... picked her up and her dad says "if you take her home, you'll regret it"
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
I mean, I know they're ugly, but I cant turn down a birthday threesome.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Why were you staring at her like that over breakfast?
Because I was eating with a spoon to remind her that she threw up on my hand while she was MAKING me spoon with her after our drunk sex. She got it. Don't worry.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
Dude, im sorry I had sex with that girl I was trying to hook you up with last night. Good news though she puts out
we left when one of the guys tried to stick himself with an IV that he found
Today, this cop risk his life to save me from a sink hole but all I could do is laugh, I was so stoned
The hangover struggle is to real, just passed the drive thru window. Twice.
Randomize
