the shit that comes out of a woman's mouth when she knows you can't hit her is fucking unbelieveable
My farts smell like St. Pauli Girl. Last night was too much for a Monday.
He doesn't make grammatical errors. Even while getting head.
I HAVE FLAVORED BLOW. THIS SHOULD NOT EXISIT.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
as he pulled out he yelled "no kids!" and then passed out on top of me
You can't possibly imagine how much I miss you. At least I'll always have that hidden folder in my computer.
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
Next sat night Titanic party. Bring your floaties, trashy necklaces, and a large lung capacity. This ship is going downnnnnnn.
My goal for the night is to see your housemate's one lonely teste.
When was the last time you wore pants?
Time is relative.
And pants are optional.
if a girl cums in a dorm room and no one hears it did it really happen?
Omg this place. I'm at a neighborhood party. My mom has kissed two other moms. Where am I
My only contacts are booty calls or the club hockey team.
Sometimes I wish I could tell all my past/present hookups what the nicknames that my friends and I have assigned them.
Randomize
