I gave my ex the dutch oven last night. How was your night?
is not sure whether or not everyone at the club last night calling me a-easy is a good thing?
we should become lesbians. not together. just in general.
we were totes just talking about. huu in the bathbub. 5 girlszzz
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
Just remembered seeing jalepenos in my vomit last night. Reminded me to thank you for sharing your queso with me. You're a good friend.
I just want to see him this morning so I can bask in my wasted accomplishment.
HI MARY. THERE IS A RAINBOW AT OUR APARTMENT
Planning a foam party. Swimsuits are mandatory, and please no granny suits. If you wear a granny suit I will stick you in the corner and put a cone hat on your head.
although steph and I had 3 bottles of wine by that point and watched an opera that featured a black dildo so anything was possible really
He literally named all the parts of the vagina as he fingered me. No more pre-med virgins.
Dont even get me started. you fell asleep in my kitchen after being cockblocked when you tried to use my roommates bedroom.
I'm glad your nude photos turned out "classy" but you cannot hang them in the living room.
You gotta have 1 orgasm for me and the rest can be for you. I'm living vicariously through you 😂
I think someone is dead in a car across the street
Scratch that, dude's getting a blow job
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