I like how she turned her beer into a wet t-shirt contest
theres a dog humping me and im not going to stop it... i really need to get laid.
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
Whenever I said your name you screamed polo and did another shot.
Theres two guys using a blow up doll to hold their beers while they float around the pool
Im on my way, tell them to get ready for a high-five
He wore homemade jorts on our first date. I'm not sure if I should leave now or embrace the white trash lust and marry him
I just got my inseam measured in raffle tickets by a drag queen. Being fondled for charity is awesome.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
You told me to keep you from drinking, but we both know I'm not that kind of friend.
That awkward moment when your boyfriend tries to have sex with his go pro on #hdporn
Thanks for coming out I think haley is drunk enough for breast milk White Russians
I would wear his ballsack as a hat if he asked me to
There is a man in my bed with "new zealand" tattooed on his back. Wtf happened last night?
what could you have possibly accomplished by watching 6 hours of a mythbusters marathon
well, i added sex in a wind tunnel to my bucket list
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