Reach down the front of your pants and feel around for a while. When you find your balls, leave the library and meet me at the bar.
apparently i traded the tiffany necklace my mom bought me for 2 shots and next in line for beer pong at the frat.
Either he masturbated at the end of the bed or she gave him a bj. Either way my bed was shaking and I was uninvolved.
You just kept saying "I want my babies to look like you."
he kept telling me that god made these magical balloons called condoms
The cop and I then joined forces to get you up off the sidewalk.
don't worry about it. We passed around the "get jeff bail" can 10 min. After you left. We currently have around $400. May I say that people here at the dorms really love you.
Today I'm playing this game called how physically long can I Lay in this one spot before moving, do you have an estimated time of departure?
Just sucked some sandy dick on a boardwalk & now I'm at a family reunion hbu
The sweaty, naked apartment dance party wasn't complete until I threw the whole jar of glitter on us. It was like the icing.
For not really liking Christmas, I have an astounding amount of holiday-themed lingerie
Dudes don't just lick butts of chicks they're not into.
Thank you. I woke up with a beard hair in my mouth. Super classy.
I'm dancing with a sandwich I just made cause I'm so happy how delicious it tastes, that high haha
I've seen your dick too many times for both of us to be straight.
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