is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
He made me leave when I challenged "all you bitches" to a game of strip taboo.
You can identity the picture as me the mistress his wife and him. It's that kinda awkard.
I've never been so embarrassed. It's like waking up as Fred Durst.
Just described your amazing cock to a complete stranger. I am officially the worst wingman (chick) ever.
Your friends turned off our power in the basement and when we went to turn it back on I got sprayed in the face with a fire extinguisher. FYI.
It's like refusing a bong hit from michael phelps... You just can't do it
Next time we smoke don't let me talk. I just said something and it sounded like I was speaking in hashtag.
I brought ur friend Scotty home... He started rubbing my crotch then fell down and passed out in front of the microwave
There's someone howling in the parking lot. Haha.
You don't understand!!! BACON ROSES!!! Why are you not more excited?!
I thought it was improvement but then i realized sex isn't an emotion and I hate everyone
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Two questions: is there going to be a bathroom at this party, and can we fuck in it. This will define whether or not I enjoy going to parties with you.
idk he wanted to trade sex for a triple order of hashbrowns
AND YOU SAID NO?????????
Randomize
