I'm sorry, but there's just something about mesh over nipples that irks me.
if I was a wizard from waverly place we wouldn't b having these problems
...She then said get into the spirit and started making firecracker noises while having sex
My dad is drinking wine out of a measuring cup. This explains so much.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
Given everything we have talked about, is it wrong to ask you to be faithful to me, despite still dating him?
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
It's a "nonproductive" (vocab word) cough. It's like a constant tickle in my throat, like there's a little elf with feathers for feet going Gangnam style on my "uvula" (vocab word).
You go to bars with sophisticated older men, I steal lawn ornaments. Priorities
I fill condoms, not promises.
Dad stumbling and puking in the White Castle parking lot = Father's Day success
dude, i just accidentally flashed your mom. BIG TIME.
He started french braiding my hair while I was blowing him. The question is not why, but how.
Yeeah, I think a threesome is one of those wedding presents you can't register for at Bed Bath And Beyond..
He knocked me over backwards in my chair. I had a beer in each hand. Didn't spill a drop.
Randomize
