It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
this dieting is killing me...just started drooling watching a dog food commercial
So J keeps drinking his last bit of drink, then spitting it out and drinks it again. Savor the flavor?
My ex was here I looked him in the eyes when I grabbed some other guy by his belt and dragged him to a room
im suggesting it to him. and by suggesting i mean we're not having sex again unless im wearing high heels
our flight took off 8 am and the bar didn't close til 5, so we decided it was a good idea to just stay out all night. Drunk logic is awesome. We were all scared we wouldn't get let onto the plane
Yea dude. I'm gonna be the life of the party. THIS BITCH GETS DRUNK BY HERSELF
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
Hay for your next interview you should go in with fake blood on your cloths and tell them you just finished saving a life, then cry
It can't be easy when an alcoholic Russian is screaming to the entire dorm "he no get hard"
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
i'm drinking soco out of a mickey mouse cup right now. i love it when college and my childhood meet in the middle.
In hindsight I shouldn't have been blasting Antichrist Superstar if I didn't want to seem suspicious driving up to a Catholic church
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