I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
I think vodka calistinics prior to and during beer olympics was a bad idea
they're using the ping pong table for ping pong. it's weird
So add panera bread to the places i love to eat that i am potentially banned from.
Question: Would it be wrong to just fuck both of them and decide who to date one performance of their cocks?
Just remember that she is a giant dick-sucking forehead and you are better than that.
I am omw to AA Fellowship by the sea w Jenny and a stripper who just paid for our jetski with 85 $1 bills
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
My code for I need help will be if I'm holding a bud light lime..
woke up to a case of keystone on my porch when I went to bed at seven that morning.. I think it's someone's peace offering for getting my roommates car towed
If you hear a loud thud and smell ozone, I may have been electrocuted.
Has anyone ever blacked out at an art show your dad brought you to?
It was extremely weird and uncomfortable mid blow job she looks up and says " tell me Simon Cowell makes your dick hard"
I CAN'T FALL IN LOVE WITH SOMEONE WHO HAS A LISP. I JUST CAN'T.
I woke up this morning to pee and six dollar bills fell out of my underwear. I guess that lap dance just bought me lunch.
Randomize
