I googled what to do, and it said to squeeze the pressure out so people are taking turns sitting on my head. I can't believe I'm allowing this
At a Jewish lesbian wedding. I stick out like a sore, uncircumcised penis.
She just sucked the buffalo sauce out of my beard. I've never been so disgusted and hard in my life.
It's like his dick is pushing through his pants and driving him over here.
He yelled "juice on the loose", yes i am sure i need plan b
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
Just put a dog collar on someone's child.....was a great hit with everyone but his mom.......I think she hates me. I'm okay.with that
you were exchanging tortilla chips with the guy at the next table, telling him your table was given the "big chips" because it was your 21st birthday
Chill out, I'm getting ready as fast as I can. I didn't even masturbate in the shower.
I was laying out of the open window, talking with him on the phone, while we were both puking at the same time.. Guys at the party called it "true love"..
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Dude, we got to the strip club as they were closing, and you starting crying because, and I quote, "This is the closest to birthday sex I'm gonna get."
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
I blame everything on you. My broken heart, my fucked up liver and my twisted mind.
I plan on getting so intoxicated, that I think it's MY own birthday
Can I play this game?
Randomize
