You and I should start a club for people who woke up on outside on a bench with no idea how they got there.
woke up in my one night stand's bed and barfed all over her floor. she came back from the bathroom, looked at the vomit, looked at me and said "normally i'd tell you to clean it and get the fuck out, but i remember the sex was good, so i'll let it go." Score.
like in an apt above a crackhead. A LEGIT CRACKHEAD. he woke me up every morning this week asking me if I wanted to buy a mini fridge and some CDs. at 5 am. EVERY DAY.
Ok Ghana you win again. Tell you what...Double or nothing over women's tennis, basketball, hockey, war, baseball, golf, swimming, diving, oil spills, box office proceeds, internet porn sites, criminals incarcerated, women's downhill, bass fishing, NASCAR, or GDP?
Vodka and Eggs at 9:30AM = thank you, America.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
And by sexy pictures I mean pictures of my penis in strange places. I rock out with my cock out.
HOW ARE YOU ALWAYS DRUNK? AND WHERE ARE TOU TRYING TO GO??
Being able to fart in her presence and not be judged is why I pay half the rent.
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
I almost had a threesome in a giant beanbag chair. I love college.
At one point of the night i was standing at the bar and 3 of them had their hands down my pants, they were like thumb wrestling for it.
Her pegging playlist is all heavy metal so stay away if you wanna keep your ass intact
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