I was rubbing the clit just like wikipedia told me to.
its 4th on my favorites list. 1. butt sex 2. mini skirts 3. three meat pizza rolls 4. fuck the pain away by peaches
i love that when i tell my kids and grandkids about how we first met it will be about this little thing called a "poke" on facebook
Got laid at the last second. Facebook chat is good for something afterall.
I'm terrified to sleep next to her. Of course the sex will be fuckng awesome.
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
I just couldn't help myself when there was a FOUNTAIN OF SHOTS
please come over and have sex with me so we can talk about prom and kill 2 birds with one condom
Im in the STD packet for new students this year. And im going to be plastered tonight so be forewarned
Don't I can pass these orgasm blushes off as sunburn for much longer...
Not sure if creeper guy is too drunk to talk or I'm too high to listen.
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
I really need to get to the point where I can poop at his house. I’ve taken three shits on the way home already.
For future reference: When the bouncer is approaching you to remove you from his bar, you don't respond by taking off your pants.
Randomize
