Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
All i remember was he was wearing billibong pants... well actually my mom found that out for me.
Also I climbed atop a mailbox with a toilet paper hat and a wolverine claw made of glowsticks, screaming at passers-by that they were going to die. Control me
best friends dont let best friends get an STD of the eyeball just saying
My mom ate salad out of the vodka bowl
I could study for finals and ace all my tests but wheres the fun in that? id rather black out and hope for the best
Are the transvestites working the counter tonight? Last time I was there they gave me love advice.
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I woke up to a stripper (who added me on Facebook) messaging me reminding me to cancel my card if I can't find it
I'm kinda glad you won't be in Vegas tomorrow because you'd make us go streaking or throw dead animals at them.
We were 69ing, but at an angle so we could both still watch Wall-E
I parked in the SAE Fraternity lot and left a note that said if you don't tow me you will all get a blowjob.
well I ran around the park drunk with a plastic baby and fell, all while screaming "I WILL PROTECT YOU CARLOS", yeah there's video
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
Fruitcakes are only good for throwing at neo Nazis.
Randomize
