I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
we should go somewhere reaaaaaal shady
went to sleep on the couch in jeans and socks. woke up in bed totally nude no memory of moving. best farewell party ever
One thing i hate about playoff baseball: George Lopez
He's a fan of Alicia Keys on Facebook. It doesn't NEED to say 'interested in men'.
i'm making a list of conversation topics in my blackberry so the ride won't be so awkward
It was a cry at the bar alone type of night, served with a side of passing out facedown in my nachos.
I'll hold a taco with my boobs for you
I didn't just get this from the chlamydia fairy.. You should probably get tested.
I'm so eating pot-chocolate cookies while preggers. This kid will be so amazing.
Well while you were being a dick I was taping back together a cougars broken heart
Also, if asking a guy to come over and watch curling with you doesn't scream let's fuck then idk what does
He asked me for a pic so I sent him a pic of my boyfriends dick.
drinks after work?
that question mark offends me.
He weighed maybe 130, his dick had to be 30 of it. SO BIIIIG.
Randomize
