Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
Im am drinking whisky alone in my parents basement. I think I just watched the point of no return stroll by.
Come on, video tape it. Take one for the team
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
he rolled over in his sleep, called me a hoe and then grabbed my crotch. some things never change, asleep or not.
And I don't know what it is about weed making me want every episode of the real housewives of everywhere
There is nothing more embarrassing than your birth control alarm going off while in a meeting with your boss and they tell you to take it.
You started drinking at 2:30, did you really think you would be able to remember?
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
We met a guy named Raymond. You called him ramen all might and told him you would eat him up, "like sex, on a budget."
just woke up under a car ? That's odd
Holy fucking shit
WAIT BUT IM WEARING A BACKPACK THAT MAGICALLY HAS 30 BEERS IN IT
He looked at me and just said "moist". The entire party shut down from uncomfortableness. He is an anti-party wizard.
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
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