Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
It was like a drunk episode of Dora the Explorer. In English.
Somehow I feel more guilty using her razor then I do having sex with her boyfriend...
Do you think I threw out my left shoulder during the keg stand or the stripper pole? It's medically relevant my chiropractor wants to know.
not saying it was a bad idea to throw an impromptu party but someone stole the microwave
Just stop talking to douche bags. How do you manage to attract every asshole within a 100 mile radius?
If i could answer that i wouldn't be so afraid to move to a more populated area
i got her number while she was sitting next to her boyfriend. her actual number. i might be a superhero
We went to IKEA super baked wearing fake mustaches. You?
For only eating leftover pizza for breakfast today, you sure do have a lot to vomit up...
I'm not going to say what I did. You're smart enough to figure it out. But I did it. And you owe me 20$
I ended up in bed with a man from London in a sorority wing I am not apart of. Tequila fucks you up
Tonight I researched being a phone sex operator and teaching English at a French school in Africa. I think my future lacks direction
Quickly hiding the condom wrappers, ropes, and handcuffs right before the parents arrive to help with moving out? Priceless.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Im experiencing the awkward moment after realizing two of my straight female friends have had sex with each other
Randomize
