all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
just saw someone puke all over a michigan fan. he didn't even flinch.
Having a pigeon watch you poop is just creepy. Drunk or not.
....I found a picture of what appears to be the underneath side of the barstool (taken from the floor) and to top that, 9 pictures of the ceiling. Also, did I mention there's a picture with us posing with a pregnant lady at the bar?! WELP
Thanks for stopping me from letting that 14 year old feel my boobs. Thanks.
I have just figured that it takes exactly 2 and a half rums to clean the bathroom..
I think if it were a part of everyone's daily routine, the world would be happier. International Finger Yourself While Bathing Day.
When a girl says " I never would have come over if I knew I was getting kicked out at 7am." the correct response isn't "but think of how responsible you're being."
I feel like I grabbed someones dick last night, & if I didn't I'll be disappointed in myself
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
I'm not saying you did or didn't sleep with him but he's has your thong hanging from his ceiling fan
We were banging then all I remember is coming down hard and smashing my top teeth off his forehead. I just rolled off and tapped out. Done-zo
IM HUNGOVER AT MOTHERS DAY BRUNCH AND A NUN FROM CHURCH JOINED US
If you had a dick, I would hope it falls off and comes back to haunt you while fucking your ears at night. But you don't. But if you did, that's how mad I am at you
Randomize
