I loved tuna sandwiches so much in grade school it was so embarrassing
Everyday all the kids would be like oh grosss whose eating tuunnaa
worst lay ever....
as long as you cum, there is no bad sex
ya... thank god for condoms, I was able to fake it... I stand by my original statement
dude i need to stop getting high. i cant afford to eat like this...
I knew her barely 30 minutes before we got naked. This whole fraternity thing is starting to grow on me...
Well no need to be a stranger, even if you aren't interested in joining my bisexual polygamist marriage. New city, new friends.
hey, its the girl who gave you a bloody nose and paid you back with a blow job. have you seen my shoes?
I can't wait for the 4th. I'll probably get drunk and end up puking all over whichever 18 year old I end up making out with.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
Challenge: Try to have your balls hanging out in every picture you take tonight
Challenge Accepted
rolling absolute tits, turn on the red lights for when i get home.
Steve called. He needs me to pick him up. He also asked for a set of his clothes, he can't find them. He is such a strong motivation to stay sober.
I feel like I should pray to the god of Febreze, because it is like it washes away the smell of all my sins from the bed
u kept repeating to itself "hot cheetos and nacho cheese sauce.."
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
But yeah, I am thinking that "Cake Heresy" will now be a thing
Randomize